Death By Rum Balls Page 8

  “Do you know what he does?” I asked. “That bracelet he gave Julia had to set him back a bit.”

  “If it’s real,” Frank said. “I don’t know what he does, and I don’t think the Queen does either or she’d be all over repeating it a hundred times like the crown roast,” Frank said looking at his reflection in the stainless toaster. He was licking his fingers and running them along his eyebrows. “She wants me to call the insurance company today and add the bracelet under her policy.” He let out a sigh as if a phone call would tax him terribly.

  “That roast was good, so she had a right to brag on it,” I said.

  “I’m sure we will hear it again today after she has a serving,” Frank said as he was checking his eyebrows in his toaster reflection again.

  “You said he’s staying at the Fairmont. That’s close to the hospital,” I said.

  “He likes the lobby. Probably because it’s the only place in the city with as many Christmas decorations as here,” Frank said. He was putting out a clean cup and saucer for my coffee and fumbled, breaking the cup. I watched his hands shaking as he cleaned up the pieces.

  “I don’t need another cup, Frank. I’m good with this one,” I said.

  “LB called and said he’s bringing Julia home this morning and then he’s going back to the hospital to sit with Donna.”

  “That’s nice of him,” I said.

  “Nice? I think it’s weird,” Frank said. “LB doesn’t know Donna. He’s here to see Julia and he’s willing to sit in a hospital room for hours waiting for Donna to wake up?” Frank said. “Why?”

  “Maybe he’s trying to impress Julia, or she sees something in him we don’t,” I said.

  “Julia wants to see something in him. She wants what you have,” Frank said.

  “What I have? What do I have that Julia doesn’t have ten times, if not,” I waved my hands around to indicate the mansion, “one hundred times more of?”

  “Well, you have Jiff who is over the moon for you,” Frank said, stopping whatever he was fussing with and looking square at me. “And, you have Dante who you are over the moon for. Julia wants those things. Oh wait, someone is over the moon for her. It’s Julia who is over the moon for herself. My bad.”

  “Frank, be nice to me or I might have to tell her you said that,” I said while a big smile forced its way on my face.

  “Frank do you remember anything you didn’t mention to the police about last night—the guests, the neighbors, the rum balls—anything?”

  He started to say no but stopped. “This might be nothing, but when Julia isn’t home, LB stops by and I can hear him walking all over upstairs, snooping from room to room. I think he’s looking for something.”

  “That’s a little forward. Did you ever hear him say where he’s from?” I asked. “I heard Larry ask LB if everyone wore hats like his in Colorado. How did Larry know he was from Colorado?”

  “No idea,” Frank answered.

  “LB hasn’t known Julia that long, has he?” I asked.

  “Maybe two to three weeks,” Frank said. “She and Larry have that in common. He married Donna two weeks ago. I don’t think they had a long love affair either.”

  “That’s right,” I said. “Well, maybe they both wanted someone in their lives since their dad just died not long ago. Maybe they felt the need for family when their last parent died.”

  “I think it has more to do with the dad’s inheritance. I heard Julia on the phone with an attorney, and she asked what did her brother know about it. And that was before she knew he got married,” Frank said.

  “What about Larry and Donna? Were you here when they arrived?”

  “Yes, they got here right after you left. She sent them to the French Quarter pronto. The only thing I remember about them is he was sweating when he came back here, and it kept getting worse from there. I don’t remember him sweating like that before he left. Julia even commented on it, or rather commanded him to change his shirt before the party,” Frank said.

  “Did he? Did he change his shirt?” I asked.

  “Yes, for all the good it did,” Frank said. “LB got here right after they left. That’s when he told me to take up the luggage.”

  “So, LB met Larry and Donna when they came back here from the French Quarter?”

  “No, he had left by then to go back to his hotel to change. He came back before Larry and Donna came downstairs to join the party. They came down right after you arrived,” Frank said, striking his thinking pose of one hand holding his elbow while the other hand held a finger to his lips.

  Hmm. I wonder why Larry thought LB was from Colorado, I thought to myself. I asked Frank, “What did the police ask you, and what did you tell them?”

  Frank’s hands started to shake again and he said, “That new cop, Detective Taylor, he called me a jailbird.” He asked me, ‘What’s a jailbird like you doing in a nice place like this?’”

  “Frank, you know those cops all act like everyone is guilty. Besides, he’s new here. Hanky will set him straight,” I said.

  “They both think I did it. Detective Hanky doesn’t like me and she doesn’t like Julia. She told Detective Taylor I was an ex-con, and I was probably here trying to rob Julia and her guests,” he said, barely getting the words out before he started crying. “I’m not an ex-con,” he blubbered. “I spent one night in Central Lockup because some drunken tourist in the French Quarter said I was trying to steal the broach off the jacket she was wearing. I was just admiring it.”

  “Frank, we need your help, so pull yourself together. Besides, you know Julia and I don’t think that, and we know that’s not what happened, so let’s try and figure out what did happen yesterday,” I said. “You know more about the goings on around here than Julia does. Did you tell the police about the rats?”

  “No, I didn’t, and I don’t really want to. No one saw that except me,” he said.

  “And me,” I said.

  “Did you give them the boxes of rum balls?” I asked him. “I told Detective Taylor I saw two empty boxes in the dining room and there were more in the kitchen.”

  “Yes, and Detective Taylor asked me if I touched them. Of course I touched them. They didn’t walk into the kitchen by themselves,” he said.

  “That’s just so they know whose fingerprints to eliminate if they dust for them,” I told Frank. “By the way, do you have a phone number for the president of the cooking club?”

  “Yes, I’ll get it for you. Why are you calling her?” Frank asked. “She’s like ninety years old. She told me she started this club over fifty years ago. She never comes to the meetings or cooking classes anymore, but she likes to stay involved.”

  “I want to ask her who had what number she assigned to the rum ball boxes,” I said.

  “Well, you might want to go see her. She might be losing her hearing. Julia screams at her over the phone when she calls her,” Frank said.

  Just then we heard Julia come in through the front door.

  “Oh, wow,” I said. “I thought you came back late last night and were upstairs sleeping.”

  “The doctor just gave us an update about an hour ago. I’m just getting home,” she said.

  “You didn’t want to stay downtown with LB?” I asked.

  “I’ve got a lot to do, and sitting around in the hospital waiting on someone to wake up is not a good use of my time. LB brought me home and went back to wait there with Donna,” she said, going for a cup of coffee.

  “That’s nice of him to wait, so if she wakes up she sees a familiar face,” Frank said and gave me a quick look when he was sure Julia wouldn’t see it.

  “How familiar is LB with Donna? Didn’t she just meet him at the party?” I asked. “Do you think he’s the right person for her to see when she wakes up?”

  “Yeah,” Julia answered. “LB just met Larry and Donna last night. LB being there when she wakes up is better than no one being there, and a hundred times better than me having to be there.”

  Th
is was odd. Julia didn’t seem worried about her new man sitting at a hospital waiting for a woman he didn’t know to wake up.

  I asked Julia, “How did you meet LB? He said ya’ll met speed dating?”

  Frank got up to make another pot of coffee.

  Julia crossed her arms over her chest and said, “He’s a nice, older man, and we met in a bar where there was speed dating when I went there to sign up. Once we started talking over drinks, we decided to go have dinner instead. LB just likes saying that. What’s wrong with speed dating anyway?”

  “Nothing’s wrong with speed dating, I guess. I don’t know much about it. What else do you know about LB?” I asked.

  Julia arms were still crossed over her chest, and now she pushed back her chair and crossed her legs. Frank was standing behind Julia, giving me the knife across the throat move suggesting I stop with the questions. Something was off, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Then she jumped up to get the coffee Frank was already trying to pour for her. She startled him, and he almost dropped the coffee pot.

  “I need my coffee, Frank,” she snapped and sat back down. Frank hustled over and fawned over her from side to side, setting a cup, saucer, spoon, and linen napkin in front of her. Then he put out the creamer and sugar holder and brought the coffee pot to the table. He placed it on a metal table protector he put down first. He poured her a cup and then put the pot on the protector and covered the pot with a quilted cozy cover. I thought he was setting the table for the Royal Tea.

  “Are we expecting the Queen of England?” I asked, trying to infuse some humor and lighten the mood. Neither one of them found it funny. “Larry said LB was from Colorado. Is he here on business or just visiting? He must be crazy about you since I saw that bracelet he gave you,” I said, trying to tone down the inquisition. Frank was standing behind Julia rolling his eyes.

  “He told me he manages his family’s businesses all over the country. He can afford to give expensive things,” Julia said without elaboration. I waited for a Julia rant with the usual outpour of needless information, but none came.

  “I’m sure he can, but isn’t this a little early in your relationship? I mean how long have you known him? How long has he been here?” I asked.

  “Why? What do you think is so wrong with him?” Julia stood with her her arms crossed over her chest and was waiting for an answer from me.

  Red flag. Frank was doing the throat cutting maneuver again, so I changed my approach and said, “I don’t think anything is wrong with him. I was trying to find out about your new guy. You know how we are here in New Orleans. You’ve lived here long enough. We want to figure out who he knows that we might know. I’m looking out for you. I’m sorry if you find that upsetting.”

  “I can worry about myself, thank you very much,” Julia said.

  I thought with all the Christmas shopping I still had to do, my time would be better spent getting items done on that list. I decided to come back tomorrow or in a day or two after Julia had more sleep. She was crabby when she was tired and last night’s events made her more so.

  “Uber is picking me up in a few minutes, so let me go get my things. Can I get this warm-up suit back to you later?” I asked.

  Julia nodded yes with her arms still folded across her chest. Frank followed me upstairs. I asked him to find out what he could on LB if he came back. “See if you can get a look at his last name on his driver’s license. I wonder if his name is really Sutton,” I said.

  Chapter Nine

  I lived just a short uber ride home from Julia. It was great to walk through my door, even if Suzanne wasn’t home, because Meaux was so excited to see me. We played a bit before I heard a knock on our front door. I answered it to find Detective Hanky standing on my front porch.

  “Hanky, where’s your sidekick? Here alone?” I asked.

  “You’re wanting to know where Detective Taylor is?” she asked.

  “No. I thought you always travel in pairs. You and Dante were always together,” I said. “Or so it seemed.”

  “I told you he was on the fast track and he wouldn’t be a detective forever,” she said.

  “Yes, but now I bet he’s working even more, longer hours with more responsibility. So, Taylor looks like your new partner.”

  “Are you sweet on him? That’s the second time in under a minute you asked about him.” Hanky said.

  “Oh, that’s right. You are a detective. Good with math too, I see,” I said shrugging her off.

  “Do you want me to tell him you like him?” Hanky pressed, trying to get a reaction.

  “Are you trying to make my life more difficult than it has to be? Why don’t you point him in Julia’s direction? She needs a man,” I said. “Maybe they would be good for each other.”

  “Taylor is a Yankee, but that’s no reason to throw him under the Julia bus. There isn’t a man on this planet that Julia will find perfect enough for her or one that I dislike enough to set her up with,” Hanky said. “The next serial killer I arrest, I’ll suggest he give Julia a call.”

  “Here you are, sugarcoating everything again. Just tell me how you really feel about Julia,” I said, laughing at her. “I’m trying to help Julia out. She tried a dating service. That went nowhere,” I said. “Look at ten-gallon hat. Julia likes him and it looks like he likes her.”

  “About that,” Hanky said, taking out her notepad. “Taylor and I went to talk to the two of them, but LB wasn’t there and Atom Ant, I mean Frank, said Julia had just gotten home from spending all night at the hospital and was upstairs sleeping. I sent Taylor to the hospital to talk to Julia’s boyfriend, this LB. You were at the party, what do you know about him?”

  “Not much. We said hello at the door. We didn’t really chat. We overheard him talking to others, but it was all small talk, chit chat. Julia’s being tight-lipped which is unusual for her when she’s got a good thing going. Even Frank doesn’t seem to know much about him. You know Frank eavesdrops on Julia, right? He always knows more than you think he does,” I said.

  “That little putz,” Hanky said.

  “Don’t tell him I told you, but keep it in your back pocket. He knows and sees more than Julia does,” I said. “I got the feeling Frank is wary of LB too. I laid eyes on him for the first time last night, just a couple of hours before you did. I heard him tell Larry that he met Julia speed dating. She didn’t really deny it,” I said. “Oh, and he calls her Julie not Julia. Doesn’t seem like he’s making much of an effort with Julia, but did you see that bracelet he gave her?”

  “What’s speed dating? Do you think I should try it?” she asked.

  I explained to her the concept of speed dating. Then I asked Hanky, “Would you leave your gun home if you went speed dating?”

  “No.”

  “Then speed dating is not for you,” I said. “You meet men in a short amount of time. Sounds good, right? Except it would make you want to shoot them.”

  Hanky had been raised by a single parent—her cop father. She did what he did, and he didn’t do girly things so neither did Hanky. She wasn’t a tomboy. She just didn’t know what makeup to use or what clothes to wear to make herself attractive. After I gave her a makeover a few months ago, men started to notice and flirt with her. She was beginning to enjoy the attention but hadn’t started dating anyone in particular. While we often commiserated that we didn’t understand men, Hanky said she just wished she could shoot them. I figured speed dating would only make Hanky want to shoot more men faster.

  I filled her in on what Julia told us when she went to sign up. “She said she got cold feet and went for a drink at the bar. He was there at the bar waiting for the speed-dating bell to ring. After they started talking, they both decided to blow off the dating fiasco and go somewhere for dinner,” I said.

  “She went off with a stranger she just met in a bar? What’s wrong with her?” Hanky asked. “Does she ever watch the news?”

  “What’s he doing here speed dating if he’s visiting from Colo
rado?” I said.

  “That’s a good question, and Julia should have asked him. We’ll have to ask her,” Hanky said. “Taylor went to the Fairmont to interview LB. We called, and Frank said that’s where he’s staying. I wonder why he’s not staying with Julia. Do you want to go with me to see her?”

  “We?” I mocked. “Does that mean you’re dumping your partner, His Gucci-ness—Detective Taylor, for me? What’s the scoop on him anyway?” I asked. “He told me he worked ten years in New York.”

  “He’s a little different,” Hanky said. “He does dress much nicer than the other guys. Some have been ribbing him over it. If he asks a question, one of these goofballs will say, ‘Why don’t you ask your Rubenstein Brothers?’”

  Rubenstein Brothers was a high-end clothing store for men that has been in New Orleans on prestigious St. Charles Avenue and the corner of Canal Street for almost one hundred years. Everyone’s father, grandfather, or great-grandfather probably had at least one suit from Rubenstein Brothers back in his day.

  I said, “He told me he saw too much weird and strange in New York. That’s why he said he left there. There’s something about him that doesn’t track with undercover work. It’s more like he went to Detective Finishing School than Tattoos R Us.”

  That made Hanky laugh. “Undercover? Is that what he told you? I guess technically he was, just not street level… more penthouse-view undercover. He worked high-end crimes. You know. the international playboy types with lots of money who were doing some really bad-boy things like human trafficking, arms dealers, child porn. So far, Taylor’s all right for the most part,” Hanky said. “His own car is a big Mercedes, and check out the suits he wears. I can tell you he doesn’t shop at Men’s Wearhouse like the rest of the guys in the department. The guy’s smart and classy. He could give your Mr. Hottie a run for his money.”

  “I don’t think so. Let’s point him in Julia’s direction, but she isn’t going to go for anyone she thinks lives on a cop’s salary. Sorry, but that’s one thing she ragged on me about when I was dating Dante.”